The Mule

I found a picture of the Mule. Thought you'd enjoy seeing it. I forgot to tell you part of the funny story. My sister, Ellen, was in the back holding onto the bar, and saying she felt like she was on a ride at Disneyland. My mother, age 78, was also along for the joy ride.

I am laughing at myself, because I found such joy in very funny things. When I was driving to Manti on Wednesday, I laughed at the smell of a skunk. When I was driving to dinner in Manti that night, I saw someone cross the street in a dune buggy, and I laughed. Very silly.

Utah at the speed of crazy....

I just got home from Utah today. It was a whirlwind trip, but a lot of fun. I am sleep deprived, but got my family fix for a little while. The weddings were beautiful. Natalie & Jake's wedding, in the Manti Temple, was attended by 87 people. We were a little crowded, but very happy to be there. They just smiled and smiled. It was really cute. Ryan and Briana's wedding was at the Mt. Timp. Temple. That is a wedding factory. I could not believe how many wedding there were that day. It too was a beautiful wedding.

Between the two weddings, we went to my sister's house in Kanosh. That was really fun. Paul, my brother-in-law, sells land and cabins, and owns something called the Mule, as part of his business. So I got to drive the Mule. It is a really fun ATV that sits four people. I got to drive it, my niece and sister were in the front with me, and my mom and other sister sat in the back. I was running on about 4 hours of sleep, and was a little silly, so as I was driving it, I was honking at anyone I saw and waving like a maniac. My sister was mortified, as these are her neighbors. I could not quit laughing.

Last night I stayed at my in-laws house. I felt bad, because I was so worn out, and did not spend a whole lot of time with them. I went to bed at 9 pm and had only gotten to their house at 4 pm. Then I flew out of SLC this morning. It was fun to see them and their new home, which is beautiful. They have vaulted ceilings, and a beautiful view out large windows. I really enjoyed the time I spent there with them. We did drive up American Fork canyon, which was lovely.

The last time I was in Utah was 10 years ago, and a lot has changed. I was surprised by the amount of houses between SLC and Provo. It seems like one huge city now. I had forgotten how breathtaking the mountains are there. So pretty. Well, pictures will follow, I hope. I forgot my camera, so I am begging for pictures. If I get them, I will post.

One other thing that happened this week, is my nephew became a father. He and his wife had a little girl on Thursday. She is really cute with lots of hair, and fat cheeks. She weighed 7 pounds 11 ounces.

Writing a Sonnet

Amanda had to write a sonnet for her english class. Of course she had some help, but all of the information about the animals is hers. So, here is Amanda's sonnet.

I Love Animals
By Amanda Gartside

I love all the animals in the wild.
Animals are interesting to me.
I have loved them since I was a young child
A friend to them forever I will be.

Go see a Giraffe it has a long neck.
Owls sleep in the day and come out at night.
Beware when walking around birds, they peck.
Eagles flying are a beautiful sight.

Crickey, I would love a pet crocodile.
Humans beware of Wombats, they can bite
Jaguars are fast and can run a mile.
Elk have great big horns and they like to fight.

So you see I know about animals.
One day I will ride on top of camels.

Our Little Adventure

I am a crazy woman right now, trying to get ready for my trip. I had to go get some things at the store. James was at home trying to finish grading papers before he had to go to his all night sleep study for sleep apnea. When I got home, I took one look at Nicolaas and something was terrible wrong. His eyes were bright red and watery, and under his eyes were swollen and purple. His nose was totally stuffed up and he looked miserable. This has never happened before. He told me he was having trouble swallowing. So, I decide to try out the Nightime Pediatrics that everyone has been telling me about. I called Corinne to get directions, thanks Corinne, and off we went. When we got there they rush us into a room, the doctor comes straight in, asked Nic a few questions, then says I am calling 911 he needs to go to the emergency room. He was sitting there completely fine, he was breathing, he was talking, but because there was the possibility that his throat might close, they would not let me drive him to the hospital. They then gave him an Eppie(sp?) shot. So, the EMT people get there, stretcher and all. Nic, jumps off the table and climbs on the stretcher, all on his own, and I am thinking, there is no way he needs the ambulance, but what fun for him to get a ride. I got in my van and followed them to the hospital. When we got there, the er was completely packed, and I could not find a parking spot. I had to park on the other side of the hospital and hike it to the er.

He is totally fine, and just has severe seasonal allergies. But, because of the eppie shot we had to stay at the hospital for two hours. Nic sat and watched cartoons, and was perfectly happy. When they finally let us go home, I turned to Nic and said, "Well, that was an adventure Nic. Thanks for that." He did get a very cool ride, and meet some very nice people.

Pictures on a perfect spring day.

Here are some fun pictures I took today in our yard.
I love spring.






What are they pointing at?








I finally got a picture of Amanda smiling. This was no small feat.









Ashley is really not trying to kill the cat, just posing him for the photo.







My sweet Kerrie Berry.







Kelsie loves tigger.







You can't see it, but Nicolaas is getting ready to throw a stick at his brother. He looks so happy about it too. *No children were hurt in the making of this picture.






What can I say, that is my sweet Nathan boy.

Spending time with good friends

Friday was such a fun day for me. It started out with a trip to the book store with Cami. She treated me to the Cocoa Treo (hot chocolate) at Borders, YUM! Then I went to brunch with Kellie, YUM again. But, mostly it was just a lot of fun to spend time with friends. I would have a much harder time being on the East Coast if it weren't for the wonderful women of our ward.

After brunch, I headed to the church to get ready for our ward activity. Again, it was fun to be with friends. Amanda totally ditched school on Friday. It started out with her tummy hurting, but by noon, she was ready to have fun. So, I took here to the church with me, and she was a big help. I can remember those days when I just couldn't go to school. I made 160 mini cheesecakes, well sort of made them from a box, with nilla wafers as the crust. That evening James and I went to one of the members homes for dinner in Italy. We made our own pizza, and had green salad, pasta salad, lasagna, and homemade breadsticks, YUM! Then off to church for dessert. Can I just say chocolate fountains were involved and it was YUM!

It was just one of those wonderfully fun days.

Great Aunt Jann

My sister just sent me pictures of her first grandbaby. This is Aubrey and her mom Lara. I would feel very old about being a Great Aunt, however, I became an Aunt for the first time when I was 4 years old. I now have 40 nieces and nephews, and 25 great nieces & nephews. I am very blessed with a wonderful family.

My Day

I have been reading Twilight, and am totally absorbed in it. I have a ton going on, but cannot put it down. If I have to do something, or have to be somewhere, I rush back so I can read what happens next. I could barely watch the Idol results, because I wanted to read. Can I just say, it is about time Sanjaya was voted off. I have never seen Simon smile so much. That was pretty funny.

Yesterday, I went shopping for the goodies for Friday night's ward activity. First I stopped at Wal-mart, they didn't have what I needed. Then on to Costco, they had what I needed, but I thought I could get it for cheaper at the Commissary. So off to the Commissary, only to realize is was not cheaper, so back to Costco, then to Weis. The good news is a good friend went along with me, so that was fun, and we had lunch together. I found everything we need, hopefully, and it is all at the church, ready to go. It is going to be so yummy, I knew it would never survive even two days at my house. My kids have an uncanny way of finding any goodies no matter where I hide them. I was a little worried they would survive at the church, so I put them in brown paper bags, stapled shut with our ward name written all over them.

In a few minutes I have to head to the school for another dreaded meeting. I am always twisted into knots when I am going to deal with the school. If I survive all this without an ulcer I will consider it a success. As it is, I do not dare to eat anything. I am always on edge that they will try to pull something over on me, and that I will realize too late. So I am grateful for prayer and the guidance of the spirit, and hopefully I will be in tune enough to hear it today. It is probably really good all that chocolate is not in my house, because I would probably come home and eat a ton of it. Yes, I am a total stress eater. Not good! So now my only option at home is a healthy salad.

Then, later today I am off to take Amanda to the pediatrician. I guess I am gratefully my life is so full. I would hate not having the things in my life that keep my busy.

Moms, according to 2nd Graders

My sister sent this email to me, and I thought I would share, because it really made me laugh.

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?

1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.

2. Mostly to clean the house.

3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.

2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.

3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger

parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in

the world and one dab of mean.

2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use

string I think.

Why did God give you your mother & not some other mom?

1. We're related.

2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other stuff.

2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.

3. They say she used to be nice.

What did Mom need to know about dad before she married him?

1. His last name.

2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on

beer?

3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to

chores?

Why did your Mom marry your dad?

1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world, and my Mom eats a lot.

2. She got too old to do anything else with him.

3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?

1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof

ball.

2. Mom: You can tell by room inspection, she sees the stuff under the bed.

3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between Moms & dads?

1. Moms work at work and work at home & dads just go to work at work.

2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.

3. Dads are taller & stronger, but Moms have all the real power 'cause thats who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.

4. Moms have magic; they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your Mom do in her spare time?

1. Mothers don't do spare time.

2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your Mom perfect?

1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.

2. Diet: You know her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your Mom, what would it be?

1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.

2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.

3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

WHEN YOU STOP LAUGHING -- SEND IT ON TO OTHER MOTHERS, AUNTS, GRANDMOTHERS

and anyone else who has anything to do with kids or just needs a good laugh!!!

Getting to Know Me

For hours and hours I could...
Read
Talk on the phone

I feel best about myself...
when everyone in my family is smiling.
when I am helping others.

I absolutely cannot stand...
bugs, spiders, ants, SNAKES etc.

I am afraid of...
Making a mistake that will affect my kids.
Someone hurting my family.

I love to splurge by...
buying books, music & movies.

I save by...
recycling clothing through my children.
shopping the deals.
turning off the lights my children leave on everyday.

I am trying to work on...
having a better attitude about homework.
doing my calling better.

In high school...
I was involved with choir, all-state, toured Europe with the Sounds of America honor chorus.
graduated seventh in my class.

In college...
unfortunately, worked more on getting married than I did on school work.

I feel I'm a good mom when...
everyone leaves the house in the morning happy.
I am patient and kind, when I don't want to be.

I regret...
Not getting a college degree.

I could never have too many...
purses, shoes and books

What about you?

Ryan & Briana and Natalie & Jake

Here are my nephew's and niece's wedding invitations. I thought I would add my nephew's as well, even though it is on Amber blog. I cannot wait to go to their weddings. So fun!

I Have Landed In Holland

Kellie sent me a beautiful article today, that has brought me hope. Thank you Kellie. It really made me start to think about having more hope in my life, and also finding the beauty in the situation I am in. If you want to read it here is the link.

When Amanda was four years old, we took her to a doctor, on the advise of my sister. I, frankly, could see nothing of concern with my child. She was after all the first, and first children learn to speak slower than others, or so I had been told, and chose to believe with all my heart. To do otherwise, was to open my eyes to the possibility that my daughter was not developing like other children. That started me on a journey, that I never dreamed I would take. I thought I would be like every other mom out there, with 'normal' kids, and 'normal' problems. That was not to be. As any mom with a child with special needs will tell you, you go through a mourning process. You mourn the loss of everything you thought, hoped and dreamed for your child. Then you roll up your sleeves and get to work with a new reality. Here are a few of the things I have learned. Accomplishment, takes on a whole new meaning. What I thought was success before I had children is very different than what I think it is now. Now, I think of success in life, as being happy, being grounded in the gospel, finding joy in every small gain, living independently, staying the course, even when giving up would be so much easier. Heavenly Father truly does know each of us individually, and knows what is best. He is the only one I can rely on to guide me. I am a very different mom than the one I set out to be. I can be happy for the accomplishments of others, even knowing I may never experience those accomplishments myself. I adore my children, and would not have them be any other way. In other words, I meant to go to Italy, but have ended up in Holland, and find it to be beautiful. I have never heard an analogy, so perfect for how I feel about my children.

When I grow up I want to be a ....

Nathan and I had a conversation today (with James listening in) about what he wanted to be when he grew up. It went something like this:

Mom: What do you want to be when you grow up?
Nate: I want to be a rock star.(singing: ner, ner, ner, ner, with air guitar)
Mom: (a little surprised) Really?
Nate: Yep, they are rich, and have earrings.
Dad: (appalled) You can not have earrings!!!
Mom: You can be a country western star, they don't have earrings, just cowboy hats, and boots.
Nate: Okay, I guess.
Mom: Why don't you be a dentist?
Nate: Do they make lots of money?
Mom: Yes.
Nate: Okay, I'll be a dentist and be rich.

Made me laugh.

It's a Small World After All

My sister Carolyn called me a few months ago to tell me her son Ryan was getting married to a girl named Briana. She also said Briana's sister lives in Maryland. When she told me her name, it sounded so familiar. With good reason, it is Amber Cottrell. What a small world. So Amber beat me to it, when she posted the wedding announcement on her blog, so if you want a look, go to her blog.

Ryan's sister Natalie is also getting married the same week. I already told you about that. Anyway, Carolyn is stressed out as they are getting closer to the weddings. I called her the other night to see how she was doing, and while we were on the phone, her bishop showed up at her house. I told her to call me later. I talked to her the next day. You will never believe what has happened. The Chapel has been double booked on the day of Ryan & Briana, and Natalie & Jake's reception. The bishop had been trying for some time to get a less active couple to get married, as they have been living together, and they had decided to get married. So without checking with the building scheduler, he set the date not realizing there was a conflict. This couple then had invitations printed up, and sent out, so now it is a huge problem. The bishop realized last Sunday what he had done, and came to talk to Carolyn and Paul about this. He had it all worked out, so while the cultural hall is being decorated, the other couple will be having their wedding in the relief society room. Then both receptions will be going on at the same time in different parts of the building. I felt so bad for Carolyn. She went into the bathroom and sobbed. Her bishop felt so bad. I am sure it will all work out, but her emotions have been close to the surface anyway with all the details involved in planning two weddings at once, and it was the last straw. Knowing my sister, it will be a beautiful reception, and in the end it will not matter.

UGHHHH! & Huge Blessings!

I am getting ready for a meeting at the school, to specifically plan out Amanda's next year, and generally high school, and broadly her life. This is a terrifing prospect for me, as I do not want to make any mistakes. I have been meeting with a wonderful person named Julie, who runs a non-profit organization to advocate for parents with children with special needs. We have been working together for about a month, and finally got all the information we needed to discuss where to go from here. I met her today at Barnes and Noble and right off the bat, I can tell she is almost as angry as I am about how the school has handled Amanda. I am so grateful she is working with me, as I would be totally lost without her. It is really hard for me to come to terms with the many mistakes I have made along the way. Mostly in trusting that I am being told the truth, without really finding out. It is so difficult to navigate the special education maze, but I feel like I am understanding things a little better. I dread the meetings, and it is hard for me when I come to realizations that I have been lied to, or that I have made the wrong decision. After meeting with Julie today, I got in my van, and cried the whole way home. How could I have not caught on sooner, and what price is Amanda going to pay for my lack of knowledge. All I can say, is I have to get over the guilt and move on, as it does no good.

Here is the huge blessing part. Julie recommended I have Amanda privately tested, so we have a better understanding of the underlying causes of her disability. So I called Kennedy Krieger to get an appointment for not only Amanda, but Kelsie & Nathan as well. I was informed that they are making appointments into January and February of next year, but they have cancellations and they will be able to get an appointment in 4-6 months. Yes, this is super discouraging. However, when she went to actually schedule the appointment, she said, they had someone cancel for tomorrow, can we come in then. I felt like crying. Such a blessing to get her in so soon, as her meeting is the end of this month. I had to do all sorts of rearranging of my schedule, but totally worth it to get this done.

So, I am feeling much better about things after a good cry and some Heavenly intervention. I am trying to look for the good in all of this, and we have been incredibly blessed and led to the people who can help us help our children. Somedays I want to shake my fists, and say why my kids, but mostly I am just grateful for who they are and their sweet spirits. I think they must be incredibly strong spirits to be given such challenges so early in their lives. Other days I am amazed that Heavenly Father thinks I can handle this, but mostly I am humbled that He is letting me try, and guiding me when I fall way short. Most days I lack the confidence that I can do this, and question my ability to be the kind of mother my children need, and pray for help to not fail my kids.

Last year I wrote a poem about Amanda, and thought I would share, as it shows how I feel about her.

God's Beauty

Does beauty come from within us?
Or does beauty come from God?
Tis pictures of such lovely bliss,
And flowers planted in rich sod.

Are acts of love a beauty too?
Do words of kindess matter?
Is it the sweet child eyes of beautiful blue,
That to our God does flatter?

Is my special child a gift to all?
Do others see my view?
I look at her as standing tall,
Her color the brightest hue.

For I look at my special child
As the greatest beauty found.
Her manner in struggles so mild
Close to God's heart she is bound.

So beauty may come from the notes of a song,
or colors in art, or words in a story.
But God is the author of beauty all along,
Shining through His children in glory.

Clean Like A Man

James came home from the library with this book. He was totally excited about it. Of course I had to see what this book says. So here is an excerpt that pretty much lets you know what this book is about.

"Clean Like a Man is filled with manly advice, tips and techniques for cleaning and organizing: how to get motivated to tackle housework, get it all done faster, and then keep your place looking its best with the least amount of effort. Maybe not perfect, but certainly good enough for a guy. What's more, Clean Like a Man focuses only on housekeeping tasks that matter to men. It will not discuss feng shui, arts and crafts, recipes, interior decorating, origami, centerpieces, or anything else that smacks of Martha Stewart."

I thought this was pretty funny. I will let you all know if it helps James "Clean Like a Man."

The Army Crawl

This morning someone ??? put a piece of garlic toast into the microwave and nuked it for 10 minutes. Of course nobody will confess, but they all blame Amanda for telling this anonymous person to cook it that long. So Amanda comes running into our room, telling us there is a fire in the microwave. The minute she opened the door we could smell it. James went down to investigate the problem. I was listening from upstairs, and Kerrie is totally going crazy. She is screaming at the top of her lungs, "army crawl, everyone get out of the house."

So James comes up to give me a report, only he is laughing pretty hard. Apparently, when he got downstairs, there was hero Kerrie, leading her small band of followers in the army crawl toward the front door.

Funny way to start our last day of spring break.

My Very First Pair Of High Heel Shoes

Today was a very fun day, as Amanda and Ashley both wore their very first pair of high heel shoes. It was a great coming of age day for them. Ashley has been pretty receptive to the whole girly thing, but Amanda is a different story. She has fought me all the way with this. I have tried very hard to just let her be who she wants to be, which is comfortable. She will not wear a shirt smaller than adult XL, simply because she does not like being uncomfortable.

Amanda was so funny. She was trying very hard to not let me know she was liking all the girly stuff we did today. I talked her into letting me curl her hair, which was no small feat, she never lets me do it. After her hair, I asked her if she wanted some makeup on. She rolled her eyes and said okay, as if it was the greatest inconvenience in the world. Then I talked her into actually changing her earrings, (first time). By the time we got to her shoes, she let me paint her toe nails without any resistance. When she stood up to walk in her new shoes, she asked me, "how am I supposed to walk in these. It feels like I'm walking on my tiptoes." I said, "with lots of practice." I kept watching her at church and she would put her hair behind her ears so everyone would see her new earrings. Thank you so much to all of you at church who made a big deal about how she looked. It made her day, and mine.

It was just one of those perfect days I will always look back on and smile about. What a great day to be a mom!

Funny Nicolaas

Nic has always had a very dry sense of humor. So here is Nic's funny story. James had gotten out of bed to get ready for work the other day, and Nic came in and got into bed with me. He then says with an absolutely straight face, "Dad, your spot is hot, and I do not mean as beautiful." We laughed and laughed. I then asked him how he knew hot could mean beautiful also, and he said, "I do not know, I just know it does."

Easter Outfits

For the last several days I have been shopping with my girls for Easter outfits. My mother always bought matching dresses for the girls, and matching ties for the boys. I did that for years, until my older girls started to rebel. It is amazing and wonderful, and distressing sometimes, to see them emerge with their wonderful personalities, and opinions. So gone are the days of matching outfits, sort of. I always try to encourage them to pick outfits that will complement the other's outfits, so we can do a family picture in them and look okay. Of course, the boys do not care what I put on them, so they are still matching. James is always a good sport about it, but he teases me. As we head out the door for church on new clothes occasions, he always remarks that it is time for the dog and pony show. This always makes me laugh.

I love this time of year as it is a wonderful time to focus on rebirth. We see it all around us as the whole earth seems to be awakening from slumber. I love watching for the color to slowly bloom on the trees. Watching the progress of the bulbs as they peek up through the earth, gives me great joy. When the flowers finally spring from the center, I feel glorious. This year I insisted we purchase some chairs for our front porch, so I could sit and enjoy the outdoors. I love the brightness of this time. The days lengthen and the sun seems more joyful. Gone are the gray colorless days of winter, at least for a season. I am so amazed by how much the earth's seasons mirror my own. How I am given the opportunity for rebirth in my own life. To awaken and find joy and happiness after struggling through gray days. To find more vivid color in the many blessings I receive, and the lessons I learn.

I guess at this time of year I see a visual reminder of a loving Heavenly Father and a loving Brother. I love to be reminded of the Easter story. It is such a story of hope. I heard on the radio today an announcement of a program to be broadcast tomorrow about the life of Christ, and particularly His resurrection. One of the comments was something to this affect. There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who want to believe, and those who seek the truth. I thought to myself, how silly, to say those that want to believe are somehow different from those who seek the truth. I think those who believe, are the ones who understand the evidence of truth. I am so grateful for my testimony, and the peace it brings into a very restless world.

Pictures from our trip to the cabin

HP Cabin

Okay so here is the report. We loved the cabin, the setting, the hot tub, the creek, etc. The cabin is smaller than the pictures make it out to be, and the yard is pretty small. The lake is not in the back yard, but down the road a bit.

They were not kidding when they said it will only sleep eight. There is some floor space, but not much. The game room is not accessible from the house, you have to go out the back and in another door. But, seeing as we will be reading more than sleeping, all of this should not be a big deal. Except for me who will be sleeping some, as I will need to drive everyone home safely.

The setting is wonderful. I can see us reading outside, unless it is just too hot. Ashley has already picked out logs for us to sit on and read by the creek. The cabin does have a good a/c, and the upstairs, which tends to get hot, has it's own a/c unit. Overall I think it will be a fantastic place to read Harry Potter.

There is also a Food Lion on the way to the cabin (about 20 min. before reaching the cabin), so we can stop there and pick up the perishable food we may need. It takes about 2 hours to get to the cabin from here.

Questions anyone?

Wild Wonderful West Virginia

We have escaped the fast paced life in exchange for a cabin in the woods of West Virginia. The views are breathtaking, the hot tub is relaxing, and the cabin is cute. We are enjoying being together as a family with nothing better to do than talk, play games, hot tub, sit in front of the fire, listen to conference, giant journal, and read. It has been a much needed break for all of us, including the cats, which we brought with us.

There is nothing more wonderful than sitting in front of a large window, facing a beautiful view, while listening to inspiring words from our loving Father in Heaven, delivered by His prophets. What a recharge this has been. We are staying for a few more days, then back to the realities of life, hopefully better able to face them.

In case you are wondering, it is the Harry Potter cabin, so I will post a report about the cabin when I get home.